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Divorced and Need A Loan?

About 20 years ago now I ran into a guy named Bill. Bill was  salesman in his thirties, slightly overweight and always out of breath. I worked with him selling copiers in a small midwestern town. Compared to other folks in the area, we were doing pretty well for ourselves. We were both making six figures and both had nice homes.

When I first met him, he was constantly skirting the line of inappropriate at the office. He would talk about girls butts or some porn movie he just watched. I knew he was just flapping his gums and never made much of the things he was saying. In fact, the whole office didn’t take him very seriously.

One day he mentioned he had an account with Ashley Madison. I didn’t think much of it at the time. Some of the women in the office great sick and tired of his tall tales of bar room shenanigans as well as his chauvinistic  attitudes. Then things hit a fever pitch.

A few months ago we all went out as an office and all had a few too many drinks. As the liquor flowed, so did Bill’s lack of discretion. He started showing Pam (Office Secretary) pictures of nacked girls on his phone and then our boss Peter finally confronted him.

He told Bill that if he didn’t knock it off, he would call Bill’s wife. That seemed to calm him down similar to telling a child you will call his mother if he doesn’t stop doing what he’s doing. He just liked to talk and get a little while while drinking… or at least that’s the extent at which we knew about.

2 days after the office party, Bill came in to work looking terrible. He told us the news that he was getting divorced. He looked like he had been awake since the party and probably drinking the whole time too.

Some of the women went over to console him and everyone was interested in what exactly happened. He said “there was a lot going on we didn’t know about” with the tone of defeated man. Looking vulnerable for the first time, he went on to tell us more than we ever wanted to know.

As it turns out, he was a very active member on Ashley Madison. He didn’t believe he was seeing all the local nacked girls from his account so he started creating more paid accounts to see more women. In fact, it sound like he was spending over $300/mo on that site alone. Apparently he wasn’t just playing around, either.

Bill was meeting a lot of these women and having affairs all over town. He was on a mission to find every loose woman in the area and get them into his “system.” It was revealed that he would first contact women online, then had a fully automated response system along with a plan laid out for every night of the week. For instance, if the first date was on a Saturday, they would go to Vito’s for an early dinner, watch the live band playing at Henry’s, then the goal was always to get to the pool tables at Breakshot’s before trying to take her home. I haven’t seen them, but I guess he even had notes with the exact times of when everything should happen that would offer the greatest chance at success.

It sounds like it was all working pretty well until his wife started wondering why he was “working” so many late nights. She caught him red-handed the night of the office party. I guess he had setup a hookup date with a girl he had already known quite a while.

So, fast forward a few months and Bill is in the middle of a horrible divorce. He doesn’t have the same bravado he once did and looks pretty beaten down. He’s been gaining weight and looking depressed. I finally asked him what was going on.

“This divorce is ruining me financially” he told me.

He went on to tell me that she has wiped him out. He didn’t lawyer up or even try to hold on to his money or things. He felt so bad that he gave her everything he could… and then some. She thought he was worth a lot more than he actually was. It’s a rough spot to be in.

With the stress getting to him, he finally decided he needed a personal loan to take care of his bills and hers. Unfortunately his credit had been so ruined, that the only loans he could get were one hour payday loans. Instead of just taking out one, he ended up taking out 6 of them with separate stores across towns to come up with the $5,000 he needed. No he owes almost $1,000 every two weeks just to keep up with the interest on these loans.

This is why you should be very careful with divorce and loans.

What’s Your Loan For?

At you can get loans for anything you need money for. Recently we decided to ask visitors what they did with their most recent payday loan and they allowed us to share their stories. Some are a little shocking. NSFW.

Bill from Kentucky –

When I was working full time I never needed a loan. Then my company asked me to cut my hours from 40 a week to 20. This went on for 2 years. It got me into financial trouble and eventually I had to sell my house and my car. I bought a little trailer home and an old used car to get to and from work. I actually budgeted my life down pretty well, but from time to time things would get tight. When you’re living off only a little income from a part time job, when things go bad they go really bad.

I found out I had actually been overpaid by about $1,000 at work over the course of a year. It was an accounting error that simply wasn’t obvious at all to me. Instead of just letting it slide, my sleazy boss said I had to pay it back within 2 weeks. He was accusing me of stealing it and it was really outrageous. This was the first time I went in for a loan. I was able to use some savings and the loan to pay them off in one week. I quit shortly thereafter and haven’t had to take out any more loans but I had a really positive experience.

James from Milwaukee –

I’ve been having affairs all around town. I like my wife, but I like having a lot of sex too. The only problem with meeting all of these new women is how expensive it can be. I had to buy profiles for online hookup sites like Affair Alert (after doing my research and reading a good affair alert review), take these women out to dinner, and not to mention all the gas from getting around. I have a pretty good job and all but it gets expensive in a hurry. I just needed a couple hundred extra for a few months before I got back on my feet and they were there to help me out.

Kristen from Boston –

After I found my husband was cheating on me, I found affair alert reviews on his computer. It was pretty shocking and embarrassing. It lead me to check and see if his name was on the Ashley Madison email list. It was. Then I checked the leaked AdultFriendFinder email list and to no one’s surprise it was also there. He was such a sicko.

After the divorce, I knew there would be a nice settlement but I didn’t have everyday cash for day to day expenses. I’ve been an at-home mom for many years now and didn’t really have any employable skills.

So I turned to getting a small loan. It helped me out so much. I was able to pay off a little debt and it even helped me keep the house and car until the settlement helped me pay off that loan. It wasn’t a fun time, but I’m glad that extra money was available.

Terry from Oklahoma –

I have had nothing but problems with short term loans. Whenever I have needed one in the past, they take advantage of my need. They know I’m desperate and charge me outrageous fees. Usually I can only pay off the interest on the loan every two weeks, so what ends up happening is that after I get the money, I just keep going back to give them money every 2 weeks. It’s a viscous cycle where $600 dollars can turn into $80 payments every 2 weeks for years. That’s $160 per month and if you pay that interest for a year, that’s almost $2000 paid while you still owe $600. It’s crazy.

As you can see, these can help a lot of people, but some people have to be really careful. It’s good practice to always pay something towards the principle. In the last story from Terry, if he would have paid even $20 towards the principle (so $100 total every 2 weeks) then he’d have only paid $600 total in fees and had the whole thing paid off in 7 months.

It can be a very dangerous game, but it can be really helpful if you can be smart about it. Always remember to pay some (even if it’s only a little bit) to the principle. As far James goes, his life sure would be a lot simpler and cheaper if he’s just go back to his wife and stop messing around so much. Luckily for him he was able to avid higher debts and seemed to play the financial part intelligently.

Overall, there is a lesson we can learn from everyone here. Just be smart with how you handle your money to avoid getting in debt in the first place. If you do find yourself in situation faced with debt, use an ice pick to get out of it not a bulldozer.